Thanks to my mom who introduced us kids to the timeless, classic films and music of the 50s, 60s and 70s.... I have fond memories of watching To Sir With Love and being in awe of this man who
commanded the scene with his presence.
Watching the way he played the role of a teacher able to change his students from rowdy teenagers, to capable young adults... it made me think of my mom, a teacher who could take any class that other teachers didn't want... and turn them into students who were attentive, passed their exams, and still come looking for her, 20, 30, 4o years after she had taught them.
The
type of teacher, who can get even the most unenthusiastic student
interested in studying...
A neighbor, who was worried that her
daughter was not concentrating in her studies, asked if my mom could
help her a little by some tutoring...
My mom said yes and now
the young girl, excitedly comes every few days a week to study with
my mom... Making her mom and my mom so happy to see her so keen to
learn...
It takes passion, and love and respect for the students you have pledged to teach, to be a successful teacher that will always be remembered...
The sincerity from my mom... The passionate way
she teaches and the love for her students... Her avid love for
knowledge that bounces off her and gets her students interested in their studies too...
I know that the reason I got through my schooling
days and did well, was because of her guidance when young...
Which Sidney Poitier showed in To Sir with Love... I remember there was a scene in the movie, when he taught his students how to make a salad to get them to eat healthy...
And it resonated with me because I remember when I was young... seeing my mom take loaves of bread, eggs and all kinds of food to school...
When the IT guy in my office starts his "explanation" on what's wrong with my PC using words I don't understand, when all I want him to do is tell me my baby is gonna be ok... I also prattle on a little about MacGyver, the 80s series I used to enjoy as a kid... Not really sure why my computer problem made me suddenly reminisce about the 80s and think of MacGyver... I realize I'm a very strange woman.
A Note to the IT guy
in my Office
Look, I don't mean to be the type of person you wish you could erase with a click of your mouse... but could you please tell me
what's wrong with my PC and what I need to do... in a language I can
understand...
and not all that ancient alien stuff you're spewing... Cause I'm listening to you talk and all I hear is "Ancient Astronaut Theorists suggest..."
Think of me as a 4-year-old learning my ABCs... Cause I
didn't get a word you were saying just now... or what I'm
supposed to do to solve my PC problem.
Are you speaking Kryptonese? Cause it certainly sounded like that to
me.
I know these are just common,
everyday words to you.
They're NOT for me.
Yes. This is exactly what you look like to me right now with that fast way you were saying your words, using a jargon, only you can understand.
Hey, you can minion talk me all you want, with your "po-ka" and "la-boda" but the only thing going through my mind is... I want a banana... which would be lovely in some milk shake... that has a dash of rum... Cause that oatmeal I had for lunch didn't really satisfy my gastronomic urges.
You can stare at me, all you want, Michael Scott, but I'm willing to bet a lot of IT people in your "office" have also filled you with the urgent need for a spiked milkshake.
Yes, Mr. IT Guy? No... my mind isn't wandering... Still paying attention... but still not getting what you're saying...
Whoaaa... So that's how the insides of a computer looks like... And that's why you brought all your gadgets... I was wondering why you needed all those mechanic tools...
Was kinda worried you were going to use them on me... to you know... tighten those bolts in my head...
No... I'm not giggling at you... Just randomly giggling at my own stupid joke... I do that all the time... laugh at my own jokes... They are not funny... but they seem to amuse me...
What's that you said? No!!! I don't really have bolts in my head... It was a joke...
I know... I know... The joke wasn't very good... I didn't say I was Wanda Sykes...
What, Mr. IT Guy? Wanda Sykes??? Oh... She??? She's a comedian...
I was trying to be a comedian too...
Why do you have the confused look on
your face, Mr. IT Guy?
The look that says, “Please don't quit your
day job”.... which, to be honest, is a look I get often at my every attempt to be funny...
So you don't watch comedies? You probably watch IT movies, eh?
Like what??? Maybe Swordfish??? I watched it during my university days...
Haven't seen it? It's an IT film... It was about hacking and stuff... Hugh Jackman was in it... Yeahhh the Wolverine guy...
He can do such diverse roles, don't you agree? Comedy... Drama... brooding... Did you know he once played a
Duke... I love the Victorian era... Especially
the big hoop skirts.... One of my favorite authors is Georgette Heyer and her Regency books...
Man. Hugh Jackman is such a cool actor, isn't he?
Wait... Hang on... I didn't catch what you were saying, Mr. IT Guy?
No... Nothing is wrong with me... Why do you keep asking me that...
No... I'm not talking about Victoria's Secret... Why do all men only think of models? Like couldn't men just stick to thinking of sports...
Yeah I do like to talk a lot...
You don't really consider hacking as IT?
Well... Ok... I hear you...
What did you say, Mr. IT Guy?
That you were probably not even born yet when I was doing my degree?
This is my rambling Christmas tale... I love Christmas. I love everything about the season; the timeless tunes, the food, the weather, the corny movies... I ramble on quite a bit about all the things I love about Christmas... I go off-topic quite a lot... as usual... Sorry... I ate too much cookies and maybe drank the rum that my mom was keeping for the fruit cake... I'm
old as fudge cake, but I think my
mom just grounded me...
I
guess there's a cut-off age to being grounded but am I going to tell
my mom that... Probably not... Pretty sure there's an unwritten rule
out there somewhere... that under no circumstances... should thou ire
thou maman during the Christmas season... unless thou fancy missing
the bountiful repast thou maman will prepare...
For me, missing out
on the cooking my mom does so well especially during Christmas... is
as horrifying as finding out Santa isn't real... which I did when I
was like 8? No... last year... All those letters to Santa... gone to
waste...
Heard this on a show I was watching... A Christmas tune that's just like me... Slightly crooked... A little off-center...
I love Decembers.... For with it
comes Christmas; the season I love the most.
The
time for Christmas food, Christmas songs, and Christmas cheer...
As you
look forward with anticipation to the huge gathering of family and
friends that come this time of year.... and the food... Let's not forget the food...
The weather in Malaysia, during this time, or what my mom calls, the Christmas weather, is perfect... We don't have snow but there's a slight, cold breeze that plays with your hair and makes you feel all warm and gooey inside...
Maybe it's the season... but it does seem like the perfect time for feeling all warm and gooey...
In Malaysia, it's the monsoon season, from November to March... A time for thunderstorms and non-stop rain... when all my senses are activated...
It's usually quite cold, compared to the warmer climate we're accustomed to... but then again... as the great Queen once said... "the cold has never bothered me anyway".
Sorry... It's Christmas, the time for cheesy lines, potatoes, meatballs and pies...
More coming your way...
Thanks for the enthusiasm...
Christmas in Malaysia....
👀 A time for watching the gathering storm, the dark, puffy clouds and stormy skies,
👂 listening to the sound of thunder in the distance and the falling rain,
👃 and the earthy scent that comes from a heavy downpour.
👄 The activation of my sense of taste; enjoying the rain with some comfort food.
P.S. Fooled you, did I with that lips emoji? Trust me, I ain't kissing no fella under the mistletoe... like that mommy who kissed Santa Claus under the mistletoe, and traumatized her child, who would probably need therapy...
The poor kid...
P.S. Fun Story. My mom told us... that when my father, my very conservative, traditional Indian father, first heard the song, 'I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus', he was scandalized.
Until my mom patiently and gently explained to him that the "mommy" WASN'T actually cheating on her husband, and that Santa was actually her husband in disguise... 😀
Probably my father's reaction hearing that song...
My poor father... I'm just glad my mom cleared my dad's outrage... Wouldn't want him to wrongly think the worst of some random woman in a song now, would we?...
It's like Lois Lane... Imagine the many people who have wrongly judged her because they saw her hugging or kissing Superman...
"Look at Lois, cheating on her poor, innocent, dorky husband, Clark... Tsk... Tsk.... I get that he's Superman... But Clark will be devastated when he finds out.."
Sorry...
I was thinking how a perfect day for me would be sitting by the window, watching the pouring rain with a good book in my hand and a mug of coffee and a slice of Christmas cake by my side.... Coffee blended with whipped cream on top would make it even more perfect... with a dash of rum...
And I remembered Tyler Hoechlin and the photoshoot of him gorgeously sitting by the window...
Oh well... It's Christmas... A time for daydreams and fantasies... of Santa and Angels granting wishes... and this brooding man in my dreams...
Sorry... I sometimes forget I'm in my 40s... and not a kid anymore...
Although I do wish I was a kid again so I could be out there playing in the rain... a little dancing and singing in the rain...
I mean I could dance in the rain now. My neighbors already think I'm nuts so a little dancing in the rain is not going to make a difference.
Come to think of it, I think I did this step while walking into the house one day.
Oh my poor mom... The things she has to endure having me for a daughter...
I think I've embarrassed my mom enough as it is, so I'll refrain from dancing in the rain... Cause it's Christmas and I'm feeling generous.
Also... I really suck at dancing... My dancing is so bad, I look like I'm trying to choke myself... Or that I need to pee..
I
know that I'm an Indian and should be genetically predisposed to dancing... Like haven't
you seen all those Bollywood movies... every Indian has those killer dance moves.
I'm the odd one out...
Like my DNA is missing those dancing cells... I'm no Hrithik Roshan for sure... who not only looks good... but has the moves too... the dancing moves...
So no putting on my dancing shoes and dancing my blues away...
Staring at the falling rain is what I do best.
Anyway... Christmas!
I love Christmas and everything that goes with it. Some may call it a money-making scam, robbing you of everything you own and your sanity, but I don't.
I love the season. I always have... And I love buying things for my loved ones.
I love the feelings that come from Christmas. I love the corny Christmas movies. I
love planning the Christmas menu with my family. I love getting out the Christmas decorations and seeing the house all decorated.
Of course usually
all my Christmas ideas and suggestions are rejected...
My job is to
hand the tape... and climb the ladder and bring the Christmas
decorations box down... or stick things on high walls...
Exactly the reaction I get too when I give my ideas...
I love the smell of baking that fills the house when I come home from work, thanks to my mom and her awesome baking skills.
Nothing like the torture of the scent of your mom's wonderful cooking coming from the kitchen,
while you wait for the food to be ready.
I love going to church and singing Christmas hymns.
Most of all, I
love being at home, exchanging presents, surrounded by family, extended
family and close friends, as we celebrate Christmas together.
I LOVE CHRISTMAS!
It's
the most wonderful time of the year!
Sometimes
I wish I could afford to take just the whole month off.. The entire
month of December... so I could enjoy the season and all its
glories... To bake and cook for my loved ones... To work on the
presents... To get the house ready... To just bask in the season...
I love Christmas Tunes!
December
comes and it's time to dust out those timeless Christmas tunes. To open that
playlist titled “Christmas” that stays silent until December...
Maybe
it's the cool breeze in the air, or the sweet scent of baking, or
the Christmas decorations... December is the month for warmth and
yuletide joy..
I mean you could listen to Christmas tunes in May. Ain't nobody stopping you.
And I have been that girl, who listened to Christmas tunes in July and felt like such a badass... Like cool Jason Statham in the Transporter series.
Man... How hot is Jason Statham...
But December is when you feeeeeel these Christmas tunes.
I enjoy going to church and hearing these songs... I'm
like the weird person who excitedly waits to see what hymns they're
going to sing... then do a fist pump when it's a song I like and
enjoy singing... while my mom winces at my childish behavior then
maybe pretends to not be related to me (in her mind) when I sing loudly... in my cats
could scream voice... occasionally out of tune... but definitely with
passion...
Weird looks and stares from the congregation is a given though.... when I massacre the songs (their words not mine)... by singing them according to the melody a
singer has made his or her own... instead of the traditional version.
If they
could talk in church, they would probably say, “That's not how it's
sung, dear”.
Oh really... but that is how Cliff Richard sings “O Little Town”.
People's reaction to my singing too...
Yeah. I'm the girl, the church choir hates, for ruining their perfect rendition with my awful, cats can kill themselves, frogs hate me, voice.
Pretty sure I sang to a cat once
and the cat slapped me... True Story...
But when I hear songs like "Shine
Jesus Shine"
and “Shout to
the Lord”,
which are my favorite Christian songs, suddenly sung in church, I
can't help but sing the song loudly...
It's a song that calls for
passionate singing even if I sound like a broken kettle, and the low
parts of the song can kill flies when I sing it.
How I kill flies with my voice...
I'm sorry, church choir people, I can't help it. I love singing these hymns, so I continue to be the weird girl in church, who
sings loudly, off-key, in her horrendous voice... because it's church and they
can't have any murderous intent towards me... and my mom can't be embarrassed by me....
I mean she could and she
probably is... but she would feel guilty for feeling that way.... as it's church
and you are supposed to only have good thoughts...
And not think how cute Tyler Hoechlin looked in the Instagram posts his
fans have been sharing... wait... did I just say that out loud...
Note to self : Don't look at Insta while
waiting for your mom to get ready for church..
Because that smile... or those mesmerizing hazel green eyes and brooding look is gonna haunt you...
hmmmmmm where was I???
Yeah.. Although I feel guilty for my mind
wandering elsewhere...
And I scold myself for being a bad person...
But when it comes to Tyler Hoechlin, it's
like all the "angels got together to sprinkle moondust in his hair..
and starlight in his eyes of sparkling green".
Sorry... Where was I?
So I guess
I'm perpetually on Santa's naughty list... probably why I've never gotten any gifts from Santa...
I thought it's because he's
from the North Pole, and he can't take our hot Asian weather?
But
it's not him... It's me, isn't it?
Touche!
The copious amount of fruit cake I consumed is really working its magic, huh?
My conscience to me : Yeah right, blame it on the rum.
This
is the tale of my weight issues and my sudden realization that I need
to do something about it.
So like a member of the Night's Watch, I
pledge my life and honor to my weight loss goals... for this day and
all the days to come because "fat
night gathers"... and now my weight loss journey begins and it
"shall not end until my death".... because writing cheesy
blog posts is apparently becoming my thing... Also I really hope I
don't die now... 'cause there are so many people out there I haven't
annoyed yet...
I
share my workout struggles... getting injured while working out... the
torture of resisting the temptation of my guilty pleasures; sexy,
sinful food, and Tyler Hoechlin... but mostly it's just food,
especially those with cheese... I'm like Bruce Wayne about to begin
his journey to becoming Batman... or so I would like to imagine.... I
really enjoyed Batman Begins...
So if I'm like Batman now.... am I also rich like Bruce Wayne?
Wait... No???
Bummer!
or I should say - Bale-er....
Get it? 😀
Editor : If this cheesy start to the blog post is any indication, it's not going to get any better, is it?...
Me : Gee thanks, Editor... Why do you like to pick on me?
Yes... The "Editor" and "Me" are the same...
What can I say... I have issues...
Or just plain weird... The
crazy girl who lets the theme song to The Office play instead of clicking the "Skip intro" button that has been generously provided for you...
Like I can just imagine my neighbours going, "what the Dunder" hearing that same music every 30 minutes... for like a few hours (especially if it's a Friday night and I'm back home from work... and ready to relax into the weekend by binge-watching shows)...
Editor : Loser category - Social Life: Zero, Nobody’s Hero, Netflix and Chips, Solo Weirdo.
Hey... At least I'm not weird... let's just say special... like Zoey, where I can hear people's innermost thoughts through song like in the Zoey's Extraordinary Playlist
series...
Yup... Zoey is the Wolverine Idol...
Now she needs the Charles Xavier’s School of Rock.
Like I would love to have her mutant powers... Not because I want to
hear people's thoughts...
Because it's me... Nobody is going to be singing about how they are a sucker for me... or would walk 500 miles for me...
No sexy songs... or happy songs... or I love you songs...
Yup... definitely not getting a song like this...
For me, it would be dreary songs about how much they hate me... Like the "wish she would go back to her planet... She's so weird... The "You are so vain, you probably think this song is abou you" kind of songs...
So thank you very much... I don't want to hear your thoughts about me...
What I would have liked though... if I did inherit Zoey's X-Chord mutant powers... is to watch all those people randomly breaking out in song and dance...
And yes, this is my "I maybe am not totally averse to musicals" confession...
See... so much fun...
Anyway.... Back to my rambling tale of my weight loss exploits.
So the other day, I read about my current guilty pleasure's adventurous life...
Like going hiking, surfing, JetSurfing, dirt-bike riding, and doing all these badass stuff.
Man.. How can he look so sexy doing everyday stuff, without make-up, tv lighting and effects.
Wait... Is JetSurfing a word???? I know Jetsurf is like a noun or something... But not really sure if I can add the gerund (-ing) to it...
Who knows... Grammar isn't really my thing... Come to think of it.. Talking isn't either.. or writing.. or anything..
Nothing is my thing.. unless you count eating.. now that I can do... If there was a test in eating.. I would probably ace it!
But.. hey... words get added into the Lexicon everyday.. so it could become a word, one day... I went jetsurfing.. Doesn't that sound so impressive?
Like I'm James Bond.... I went James Bonding....
Also... I feel really cool using the word Lexicon.
And yes. I Googled Lexicon... and gerund.... and pretty sure James Bonding will mean doing something salacious and improper...
Who??? Meeee??? Yeahhhhh!!! All the time...
So anyway... With my guilty pleasure, Tyler Hoechlin, as my inspiration, I thought to myself, gee, I want to be adventurous too. To be all Batman and stuff.
To be the type of person who is constantly living on the edge....
Who can throw people across the room while whispering, in a tone meant to be menacing but was sexy instead, "So am I"... and telling kids to go back to school...
Nope... Not Batman... Like Derek Hale.
Isn't Tyler Hoechlin so cool and sexy... Sigh...
So yes... Me too want to Hale...
So I set out to do something I'm not comfortable with and makes me quake with fear.
Literally shivers down my spine. And not the good kind of shivers, which are the naughty kind. Like the ones you get from licking chocolate off your fingers.
Nope. This is the
bad kind of shivers. The scary kind.
I decided to calculate my BMI.
Cause nothing says terror than calculating your BMI.
Whaaattt!!! Why the disgusted sigh, Tyler?
Hey.... It's scary for me... Me weighing myself... usually when I'm forced to, during medical tests... worst when it's in public... surrounded by people I know... is as scary as whitewalkers...
Because
I'm quite sure I would pass out even if I see them from afar... They in all their pale-ness...
Me... Bam!
I mean scary as before Season 8.... Cause from Season 8 onwards,
their “scary” attributes somewhat diminished... Like when that
wall came down at the end of season 7 of Game of Thrones, I feared for my life...
I mean
the life of those on Middle Earth... Wait... What earth was theirs?
Westeros! Sorry forgot.. Had to Google..
So anyway... that was
scary.. I was like, "oh no... oh no... what are we going to do"...
Yeah my reaction exactly...
My mom did
watch my reaction... nonchalantly... but
hey, a girl's got to react... what a girl's got to react... Yeah, I don't
know what this means... I love to come up with weird wordplay...
So
anyway... that was scary... I watched in horror... but at the end, it
turned out to be not so scary...
They came in all their
whitewalker-ness... Growled...
Ok maybe they didn't growl... I was thinking of Derek Hale again...
See whitewalkers... This is how you do it...
Anyway... The whitewalkers came...
They
watched... They stared...
Then they got stabbed... End of story...
That was fun, noh?
My reaction too... expecting more...
Anyway... Tyler probably gets excited to weigh himself everyday...
His BMI probably sends him love letters... makes googly-eyes at him... and says it wants to make babies with him...
That seems to be kinda Tyler's thing... Getting women pregnant without doing anything himself... Without even meeting them...
Can't begin to tell you the many comments on his fan accounts I have read about fans getting pregnant from looking at him.
Seriously! I see so many
comments of “Boom! I'm pregnant!” on anything they post on
him, whether it's his photos or his videos.
While I'm at a loss to understand how that's even possible?
I know he's shirtless and all... but how can it be possible... from just a photo or a gif...
I know I'm not smart or anything... But I studied Biology in school... and I remember that's not how it works...
Like I know I'm no expert in this, seriously zero knowledge in this whole baby-making thing people do... but have things really changed in the past 20
years from when I first studied Biology?
Or did I get my Biology
lesson wrong?
Ok sorry, Mam... Too much information...
Anyway, who knows how it works... I can't remember much of what I
studied in school anyway cause it was like so long ago...
Pretty sure I
spent most of my time in school, in a daze... A haze of perpetual
boredom.. Waiting to go back home after school so I could get back to
my story books...
Actually I'm surprised I got out of school with my
life intact... without my parents killing me.... for failing.
Gee thanks...
But
for me. The person who has a fear of parties, and approach any social gatherings, like I'm about to be operated on..
while fully conscious...
Which, trust me, going through surgery with local anesthesia
(which means you'll be fully conscious but unable to feel pain.. or
actually any sensation), is the definition of scary...
For me. It has to be General Anesthesia. Always.
I don't
care if it's dangerous and I could die, if you're going to cut me
open and stick things into me, I don't want to be awake. I want to be
unconscious.
Probably the reason why I've never wanted a boyfriend. Rule of thumb for me. Sticking things into me. Unconscious.
Sorry, Barney Stinson? TMI is my middle name.
So yes. Checking my BMI is the scariest and most thrilling thing I've done.
If you're categorized under the "normal weight" category, then it's all "I'm walking on sunshine" and you feel like skipping around the house, jumping on your bed, and screaming with joy.
I guess it would be like that. I wouldn't know.
Cause mine didn't say "normal weight". It didn't even say "overweight", which I would have been ok with.
Mine was like a slap me in the face and "you better do something about your weight, b**ch!" kind of diagnosis.
